Testing One's Market Value

(I have written this article in response to violent reactions to previous post "Kalakaran Sa Saudi: CityPlaza Boys" that originally appeared in pic-link.com).

In one of series of the program "Survivors" I got acquainted with the term "testing one's "market value". That episode showed an interview with a survivor then involved in a sex scandal with another co-survivor of the show. When asked if there was something more to it, he just said "nothing", and apparently he was "just testing his market value". (See Rob Mariano & Amber Brkich of Survivor All-Stars)

A realization came to me that people in general test their sexual appeal from time to time. One may do it once or twice, or even at recurrent period. Testing one's market value is generally regarded as OK.

But when it becomes perverted and it starts to take advantage at another's expense, or when higher priorities in life yield giving way for such perversion to take over, then I think that it is time cry out "wolf".

I will not argue with people who turned this testing thing into "trade" or those who have taken to mean 'market value' in its literal sense. I am no moral guru to begin with, and they have their own reason, be it economic or otherwise. Besides it is not effective to rail against one's behavior, unless one is able to identify and discuss the causes. As ksa_flirt states the situation presents a deeper problem, but I dare not dig deep into it.

I am only saddened by the failure of people most affected by the issue to respond and express what they feel. I guess I have expected them to pour their hearts out, and shed some light where the real problem really lies, whether it is all about loneliness (or its causes) or their low self-esteem, or whatever.

Had they chosen to, we all could have been made aware of, and identify with our own, vulnerabilities. Because whether we admit it or not, such vulnerability has been used against and in fact been capitalized by both parties regardless of the side we belong (user and the abuser/d).

For people who claim that these things should be kept private, I urge you to re-think your position that you may realize the ultimate benefit of talking these things out. There is no sense in reading a book in the dark. The only way to read and understand it is to let the light shine through.

To people who maintain that a topic like this has no place in the journals and thereby should not be accorded with comments, I have single advice: lead by example.

I still believe that life is all about learning and trying to make ourselves and those around us happy, and from time to time it may include testing our market value. But regardless of what others may think or say, if our actions and decisions are always done in a way that we personally cannot respect, then we know that we are changing the course of our life – and NOT for the better.